Michael Che tries to get Colin Jost to say N-word in ‘SNL’ joke swap

Saturday Night Live‘s joke swap is back — and as brutal as ever.

The biannual “Weekend Update” tradition — in which Colin Jost and Michael Che are forced to cold-read jokes they’ve written for each other — returned for the show’s season 50 finale, upping the ante with a cameo from Jost’s wife, Scarlett Johansson.

Back in December, Jost had to read a raunchy joke about Johansson, so with her hosting the season finale, the couple seized their chance to get payback. First, Che had to invite Johansson on stage, declaring that he wanted to “apologize to someone I hurt” with “tasteless jokes” comparing her vagina to Costco’s roast beef sandwich.

“The fact is, I was just lashing out because I’m jealous,” Che said, reading from the Jost-penned cue cards. “I’ve never even seen a human vagina. And notice I said ‘human’ because I once spent the summer on a farm. You feel me?”

He then attempted a high five with Johansson, who slid away from him. 

“Maybe I’m just embarrassed about my own body — I can’t even take my hoodie off during sex because I have more nipples than a pregnant dog,” he confessed, barely holding back laughter.

“Yes, I have heard that about you,” Johansson replied.

Che reluctantly continued, “Colin, I’m sorry, too, because I owe you everything. When Colin discovered me, I was selling crack outside the Bronx Zoo,” he began, then burst into laughter. “And now look at me: selling crack outside the American Girl doll store. I’ve told thousands of jokes on ‘Update’ and gotten dozens of laughs, but I’ve never said the three most important words of all: I love you.”

But, as usual, Che got in a few memorable digs of his own. This time, he forced Jost to tell a joke about Golden State Warriors head coach Steve Kerr, under the guise that he attended the taping with his son, Nick, head coach for the Santa Cruz Warriors.

“I love Steve, I like Nick,” Jost said. “But I wouldn’t say I’m a Nick Kerr lover.”

As the crowd burst into laughter, Jost realized that he had essentially just said the N-word on live TV and broke, covering his face and dissolving into laughter.

“Seems besides the point, Colin, but sure,” Che quipped, while Johansson shook her head beside him.

Che also used the joke swap to pit Jost against SNL creator and producer Lorne Michaels.

“Before we start, it’s SNL‘s 50th season, so I want to take a moment to say something to our boss, Lorne Michaels,” Jost began the segment, reading off his cue cards with a nervous smile. “Lorne… Retire, bitch! Let me run the show.”

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Jost later circled back to stealing Michaels’ SNL throne when he read the final joke prepared by Che. “Some psychologists say adults can reduce stress by returning to a childhood hobby,” he read, “which is why I returned to my favorite childhood hobby: topping off priests with my pretty little mouth.” 

As the audience reacted with shocked laughter, a hand slid red lipstick onto the table in front of an incredulous Jost. Being a good sport, he slowly put the lipstick on before declaring, “Lorne, I’ll do anything to run this show.”

Watch Jost, Che, and Johansson cringe their way through the “Weekend Update” joke swap in the full video above.